Step Eight

Well, I guess all my fellow bloggers over the water are enjoying a nice cup of tea and celebrating Independence Day.

The point of Step Eight is pretty simple. Make a list of all the people I need, want and have to make amends to. It isn’t any more complicated than that.

The list I made was like many a shopping list I have produced every week. The listings were mechanical in nature having come from my Step 5. But when studying steps six and seven it became clear that there were others that needed to be added. These names had not being missed deliberately or even through ignorance, but rather more importantly, they had appeared because of a growing sense of the right way to live, brought about by the lessons contained in six and seven.

A growing confidence of my own security in Gods hands also meant that humility enabled me to remove any obstacles of obfuscation, fear or selfishness when thinking about the people who I would have to face and make the amends.

I did not draw up a league table of amends, the worst in the premier division the least worst in the bottom division. There was no gradation of sins. I think this point is very important for me. It showed me that self preservation and the need to be liked had no part in the process of restitution and repentance. Like wise there was no rush to Step nine no headlong striving to get the thing over and done with. Step eight was but a part of the process of bringing me in to alignment with my higher power. It was but a stepping stone.

Time and geography played a part when looking at the list. There were some whom I would see next week or next day even. Others could be seen when on business trips and visits to family. Some would require requests to meet. Others would have to be tracked down, as time had eroded the connections we once had. But no excuses must be made to avoid putting that name down on the piece of paper. There must be no half measures here.

So the list was completed, my mind and resolve firmly set. I was in Gods hands, the outcome was in his and what ever the response from the recipient was, my only response could be apology and amends (or restitution as I prefer to call it).

Step Nine beckoned and with it a sense of purpose and release. I was at least becoming a part of the human race. That is the reason why it is so important to carefully complete step eight and take time to fully understand the reason for it. It is impossible for me to make true, heartfelt amends if I have hedged my bets on the people I was supposed to put on the list.

The hidden beauty of step eight for me was when I realised I didn't care what people thought or reacted, so long as I was behaving in a correct way, it didn't matter. I was safe in Gods hands now. That's step eight's beauty, the realisation that I am Gods creation and all he wants is a relationship with me, which must mean he accepts me as I am, warts and all, as we say over here. Now it really would be arrogant to throw all that back in his face. That I have no right to do.

Have a happy independence day. And don’t forget, we are always ready to accept you all back. Once you’ve paid for the tea.